Female Cyclists and Chamois Cream: A Theory, the Right Sample at the Right Time, and a Recommendation

Chamois cream is, in my mind, an extremely personal choice. While I know quite a few people who couldn’t care less what brand of stuff they’re slathering on their most important contact point, none of those unselective people are women. My theory on the gender divide regarding how much the chamois cream selection is labored over comes down to the consequences of the choice: for women, some chamois creams on the market burn, some of them feel tingly (not in a good way), and some of them make it much more likely that a girl will have to deal with the yeastie-beasties. Guys don’t seem to be nearly as sensitive, and don’t really have to worry about some of these concerns all together.

After trying out a few different types of chafe-preventing goo, I got lucky with the fourth concoction I tried. It’s something I probably wouldn’t have ever chosen simply for the fact that the side of the container states, “Originally developed for use on dairy cows…” But nonetheless a little cow-spotted sample packet of Udderly SMOOth Chamois Cream found it’s way into my bag of bike clothes.

A few weeks later, after several minutes of frantic digging through my bag while getting ready for a lunch ride, came the sinking realization that I had forgotten the chamois stuff I had been using for a couple of years. And that therefore the ride would definitely be cut short. During the last hopeful rummaging, I found the Udderly SMOOth sample on the bottom of my bag, crammed into the corner with the dirty socks, and for once I was thankful that I almost never clean my out bike bag. Getting over the cow association, I decided to give Udderly SMOOth a shot. Moo.

Since that ride, I haven’t used anything else. Skin soothing ingredients like shea butter, lanolin oil and mineral oil makes it unique in the chamois cream realm of what’s available, and it’s well worth hunting down an 8 ounce cow-spot covered tub of it. I’ve had a hard time finding a bike shop that stocks it regularly, though a lot of them can special order it for you. Or you can just get your eight bucks together and order it yourself at


Martinique said...

I linked here from bicycling's website and I'm so glad I found this entry! I'm starting to train for my first century and the coaches are all men - and I was worried about just the problems you mention ;) I'm trying this for sure!

Tim said... Is an organic diaper rash stick, but works better then anything on the market for saddle comfort.

Gro Promotions said...

I agree with Tim, as a woman Bumazing is better than any male, or female specific product on the market so far.. why ? it goes on dry so it never increases moisture. Also it smells really good, is all organic and can be used after if you miss a spot.